ABOUT ME
Bringing language excellence to business documents, translations, copywriting, and all manner of creative writing.
I’m an experienced writer based in Arundel, West Sussex. I specialise in film and television screenplays, business documents, comic verse, and humorous speechwriting.
It is my conviction that verse is currently under-represented in contemporary film, television and theatre. For me, no other written form is as capable of being both so relentlessly funny, and yet so poignant.
I hope to contribute to wider enthusiasm for the form from the general public.
BEN HARDYMENT
Welcome to my Portfolio
“Whan goode Kinge Harolde ruled in Ancyent Dayes,
(A kinge that every Briton loves to prayse).
The Vikinges, ran amucke in oure fyne lande,
So ofte ther boots landed on English sande.
Amongste alle thys stryfe ther lived a couple yonge,
Peter and Pamme of Cambridge - ther bond was stronge.
So muche so they hastillie begat a sone.
Pamme seyde “In my ovene is a sysable bunne!”
Swiche delyt - and respyt! - was ther upon his birthe, Peter cryed “Herkneth, a giant wol walk upon erthe! Thomas of the clan Hardyment he is to be named.
For booth bodye and mynde wol he be famed.”
So posesed wer they with ther mountaynous chylde,
That whan another was born they scarsly smyled.
Now, to herke thys reaction, I knowe, is distressinge
But remember in wartyme - a huge chylde is a blessinge.
And his brother Benbow semed spindly and useles,
Good for Thomas to kikke, til his mouth was toothles..."